scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
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