my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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