The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
