Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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