I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
