He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
