Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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