How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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