That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
