i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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