we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
