he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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