We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
