your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
