I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
