my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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