fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
