I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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