Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
