Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
