two words: eviction party
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
