i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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