I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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