Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
