i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
