This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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