You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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