I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize