He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Every concussion has its silver lining
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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