I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
