Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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