My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think I sprained my soul last night
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize