I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
