I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize