apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
