So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
