Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
