You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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