You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
