My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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