Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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