Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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