we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
