Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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