Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
