I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
