I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
