id be glad to
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
