This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
