goodnight i made you a song goodbye
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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